How do you get kids to eat crappy food? Why create a cartoon character and have him him/her do surreal, physically impossible things, of course!?! …with cheese….
Category: food
What Kinda Holiday ARE They Celebrating??!
This is just naughty. I’m sorry … it just is.
Has It Gotten This Bad??
I guess it’s better than saying:
FOOD SHOULD NOT KILL YOU
Run Chicky Run! They’re Gonna Kill You!
As noted before, I’m not a fan of depicting the actual animal in cartoon form in my food marketing. So, although this guy looks happy-ish, he is RUNNING so what does that tell you? Yes, we understand this may be advertising fast food but seriously?
The word play is pretty shoddy too. A better tag line would be:
“More dead animals for your dead presidents”
It’s Just Another Juice
“Ralph, I’m doing the labels. What’re we putting on this?”
“Cranberry, Strawberry…not sure, another juice”
“Well, what’s that other juice?”
“Mike, I have no idea, it’s juice. I’m sure!”
And children, that’s the story of
“How The White Cranberry Strawberry Juice Got Its Label!”
Your Food Is Handcrafted
Yes, there are men in chef toques with whisks and ladles carefully pouring chocolate over your cookies.
Then why is that image a drawing??
Because the photo wouldn’t quite communicate the same thing. 
Popcorn Is So, So, I Dunno … POPCORN!
Marketing Madness means: Do Something Different. Even if different isn’t different…it’s different. Hence: PIPCORN.
Why “Pipcorn?”
Because it’s smaller. Sort of. Because how often are you eating popcorn thinking:
“Damn it! I wish this was smaller so I could shove more of this shit in my mouth!!”
I Can’t Wait To be Slaughtered!
Maybe it’s just me but when I see ads for meat with animals as cartoon characters, I feel worse when they’re made to look happy.
Pigs don’t smile before they’re slaughtered. Pigs don’t smile. Period.
Maybe Those New Age Marketers Could Learn Something…
I’ll say this for marketers of well-known, brand name products: they are more selective and creative when naming their brands. At the health food store, there’s just no imagination whatsoever.
How Do You Make Things Better
It’s EASY!! Just slap this little sign inside a grocery cart and everything’s all better!!
